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It’s an awkward moment when the rebels realize their rebellion has failed and the king they opposed is still in authority. Some of those who supported Absalom double down on their opinion that David should not continue to rule as king. They cite the fact that he fled the nation when Absalom gained strength.
David does not want to come back and rule if he will not be supported by everyone.
“The elders of Judah were reluctant to call David back to Jerusalem, perhaps because of their part in Absalom’s insurrection (2Sa 15:10-11). David asked his friends, the priests, to begin the movement to invite David back to his throne. Apparently, he did not want to come into Jerusalem without public support for his rule.”
Nelson’s Commentary
In order to win the approval of those who had backed Absalom, David agrees to promote his nephew, Amasa (who had commanded Absalom’s army) to Joab’s position of commander. This also may have been a disciplinary tactic against Joab for his murder of Absalom.
All of David’s decisions work together to bring peace and unity to the nation, and toward the end of the chapter, we find a beautiful story of redemption involving Shimei. If you remember, he demonstrated quite a potty mouth back in 2 Samuel 16.
“When King David got to Bahurim, a man belonging to the family of the house of Saul was just coming out. His name was Shimei son of Gera, and he was yelling curses as he approached. 6 He threw stones at David and at all the royal servants, the people and the warriors on David’s right and left. 7 Shimei said as he cursed: “Get out, get out, you worthless murderer!”
2 Samuel 16:5-7 HCSB
Shimei is forgiven by David even though his rebellion is punishable by death. From here, David goes on to offer grace and understanding to Mephibosheth and appreciation to Barzillai. This is quite a turnaround from the David we saw at the beginning of this chapter when he was paralyzed by grief and unable to go out in public.
Sometimes we need a good confrontation to put reality in perspective and shake us from our selfish cycle of dysfunction. David’s grieving was not wrong, but there is a point where grief can paralyze us from following through with the responsibilities God has placed in front of us.