2 Samuel 13

2 Samuel 13 Commentary

by Brad Boyles

What a mess here in 2 Samuel 13! It’s hard to know where to begin.

Amnon was obsessed. The thought of sinning consumed him. He seemingly had no relief from these lustful thoughts about his half-sister. But when he finally got what he wanted, we read that it only enraged him.

“But he refused to listen to her, and because he was stronger than she was, he raped her.  15  After this, Amnon hated Tamar with such intensity that the hatred he hated her with was greater than the love he had loved her with. “Get out of here!” he said.”

2 Samuel 13:14-15 HCSB 

The satisfaction he had hoped for turned out to be a mirage. But this shouldn’t surprise us. Sin always seems fulfilling but it never fails to disappoint. Amnon got what he wanted but he couldn’t stand to look at Tamar anymore because her presence was a reminder of the heinous act he had just committed so he orders her to leave. You would think she would want to leave at this point, but she begs him not to throw her out. Why?

Culturally, Amnon still had some options. He could have married Tamar or, at the very least, obeyed the law by paying the bridal price. This monetary amount was given due to the fact that she was now considered “damaged goods” and not being a virgin would severely hinder her chances of finding a husband.

“If a man seduces a virgin who is not engaged, and he has sexual relations with her, he must certainly pay the bridal price for her to be his wife.  17  If her father absolutely refuses to give her to him, he must pay an amount in silver equal to the bridal price for virgins.”

Exodus 22:16-17 HCSB 

This is why Tamar is furious that she is being thrown out. Not only was she raped, she now must live with the reality that she will probably never get married – and Amnon refuses to pay up like the law requires.

Word finally gets back to David but he refuses to step in and handle the situation, most likely because Amnon was his first-born son. The other reason we know David did nothing is because Absalom began plotting his murder of Amnon that day. Had David stepped in, Absalom would never have thought to take vengeance the way that he did.

On top of this, David was the ideal candidate to sit down with Amnon and offer correction. David knew firsthand the devastating consequences of lust!